Do you and your spouse ever getting into suffering contests? My husband and I do.
He’ll come home from a long hard day at work and plop down on the couch exhausted, off handedly ask how my day went. I’ll mention the fact that I’m really tired because both kids were up in the night, twice, and that I did seven loads of laundry, a huge grocery shop, cleaned out the fridge and as I was putting the groceries away someone threw a 20 minute screaming fit.
I’ll mention that I cleaned pee off the floor 4 times and wiped Rice Krispies off the wall after a bowl was flung from the high chair with such force that it splatted almost all the way up to the ceiling.
I’ll just start telling him how one kid scraped a knee and the other had a nosebleed and that all I ate today was a few bits of soggy cereal and the crusts off a peanut butter sandwich when he’ll yawn and shrug and say, “trade ya,” as though my day is nothing and his day is SO MUCH HARDER…
“PARDON?” I say politely while my jaw drops open, my body goes ridged, my fists tighten and I feel the steam getting ready to shoot out of my ears and venom forming in my mouth.
“Well, at least you get to stay home and relax a little. You didn’t just work a 9 hour day.”
The venom spews.
“You get to PEE by yourself for Christsakes!” I scream at him, “do you know how hard it is to get three people and a diaper bag in one of those teeny tiny little public stalls? You try taking a piss while hovering and simultaneously trying to keep two kids from touching germy grossness or fighting over who gets to flush the freeking toilet!!
“You got to EAT lunch today, sitting down!!! AND your coffee was hot when you drank it.”
“I haven’t slept in FOUR YEARS!!!” I cry…
This my friends is what you would call a suffering contest and apparently it’s not very good for marriage.
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